blech

warning: do not continue reading if you get grossed out easily

you have been warned!

i haven’t been sick-sick for a while now. when i have been “not feeling well” lately, it usually consisted of headaches or dizziness or pains. just feeling bleah. so i guess i was due–i just wish it wasn’t right before my vacation ends.

as i wrote below, i was ill for about a week. it actually started the night before the last day before vacation. i was eating a salad and halfway through, just felt really ill. i pushed it aside and went on doing my regular things. as usual when eating a lunchable, my son offers me one stack. i nibbled on the cracker and felt better, so i went back to my salad. but halfway through what was left, i pushed it away again–the nauseous feeling returned. something was not right.

the next day, which was the last day before break, i had weird stomach pains, like hot needles pushing in here and there, staying only for a few seconds, before withdrawing and poking me somewhere else. but seeing it was the last day i went in anyway and endured it the whole day. i packed up early with the intention of stopping in a few days during the break anyway, and left by 3. i came home to take a little nap because i still had to go meet my sister later that night to help her put together a movie for the game the next day. i managed to rest a little, and even nibbled on more salad (why, i don’t know), before going over. we stayed up all night working on the movie, and my trips to bathroom became frequent. the next day i went home to rest. i had barely eaten since thursday, i just had a little salad friday when i got home, and a scoop of rice at my sister’s house, which is weird, since i rarely eat rice. but i wanted something bland, and that’s what they had. when i came home saturday, i mostly slept. when i was up, i found myself running to the bathroom. sorry for the grossness, but it had turned to just liquid coming out. then i would come back to bed, curl up, and sleep some more, before waking up to go to the bathroom again.

this lasted for days. good thing i was on vacation, that i could spend most of the day just sleeping. i could not eat a thing, just because i had no appetite, even though i craved food like mad. when i actually got the food, i would just look at it, and then push it away. i just wasn’t in the mood to eat.

finally, the following friday, a full 8 days since i first felt “weird,” i felt well enough to go in to work and catch up on the things i just left in haste the prior friday. i worked for 3 hours before feeling fatigued, and came back home. after that, i noticed my appetite coming back. i could finally indulge in the weird cravings i was having! (except i didn’t!)

so that was followed by days of eating out and stuff, which i guess was too soon. not a way to ease back in! but having food was nice, again. 🙂

then came thursday night. again. i had to empty out my freezer due to a costco run, so i had some stuff that was supposed to be frozen in the icebox, with the intention of eating it soon. however, we went out to eat on wednesday, when i did that, so i didn’t get to the food until thursday night. i remember opening the bag, and seeing it had all melted already. but i sniffed it and detected no odor, so i just cooked it anyway. i tried a nibble–seemed okay–so i ate it. biiiiiig mistake.

i woke up in the middle of the night, having to run to the bathroom. i couldn’t believe it! it was back! i thought i had finally gotten rid of it! ugh! the wateriness was back, but not so much the pain. i thought maybe i would feel better in the morning. i had to! i had promised to take my son out for the last day of break!

however, i woke up 3 or 4 times that night, to rush to the bathroom. by early friday morning, i was feeling absolutely lousy. stomach pains, runs to the bathroom, and what made it worse were the little burps i was having all day, bring up the taste of the tainted dinner from the night before, making me sick all over again. i tried all kinds of mints and cinnamon drops, but i couldn’t get the taste out of my mouth. i was so miserable. there was no way i could take my son out! i felt bad.

i called my sister, who is also off and who we were going to meet for our end-of-break outing, and she came to pick up my son and said she’d take him out so i wouldn’t have to worry about him and could just go and rest. i was so jealous because where they were going, i had never been before. but i also knew i was in no condition to just go along for the ride. so i sent him off, sadly, before realizing how selfish i was being. why should he give up his fun because i wasn’t feeling well? i’m such a bad mother.

she had also dropped off some rice so i could make okai, since i don’t have any rice in the house. i made it, but again, just did not feel like eating. especially as the little burps (i don’t know what to call them–they weren’t like the full on belches, but more like little hiccups) continued and i still kept being reminded of what i ate the night before. it seemed everytime i went to the bathroom, i would get those little burpy things. gas was trying to escape both ends, i guess.

after alternating between napping and running to the bathroom, i thought i’d check on the okai. i took a bite and then remembered that i got sick from food that was sitting out, so i ended up throwing out the okai. oh no! i’m starting to become paranoid!

i really wanted some crackers or bread, but i had none. i searched through my son’s goodie bags from parties and school, and found some ritz cheese ‘n’ crackers. i took out the crackers and nibbled on those, but it was not enough to rid my mouth of that taste of the tainted dinner.

after having a dream about my kids (which usually signals to me that vacation is over–time to go back!) i woke up and had to go to the bathroom again. i came back to bed and tried to go to sleep, but could not. my whole abdomen was rumbling, making strange gurgling noises and pops. about 15 minutes later, i went back to the bathroom, and this time, as the water came out, i felt a stronger burp. oh oh.

i grabbed a towel off the rack and inhaled deeply into it–nothing like the smell of fresh towels! it calmed me down somewhat, until that trigger feeling subsided. but then my tummy made a real loud gurgle, and i thought, well, if it wants to come out, i should let it. so i allowed the feeling to come back, and ended up vomitting. big chunks of the tainted dinner came out, still undigested, which shocked me. it’s been over 24 hours! why wasn’t it digested yet?

after that, i cleaned up and crawled back to bed. i felt better, as one feels when you throw up after eating something bad. you just feel — cleansed, sort of. i jumped on the internet for a while, searching for things that may be the cause of this, even though i’m pretty sure it’s food poisoning. however, my last bout from a week ago did not include vomitting, so i just wanted to make sure. but yeah, what it mostly said was that i probably ate something bad. i turned off the computer and tried to go back to sleep.

a half-hour later, my tummy made a rumbling sound again. again? i ran to the bathroom, not making it in time. but even more came out this time. i was shocked. i thought i had emptied my tummy the last time? but no, more chunks of undigested food came out. the taste of the tainted dinner was now very strong in my mouth. ugh. i kept heaving and heaving, trying desperately to get that taste out of my mouth. when i finally stopped, i had to go back and clean the drops i made as i was running to the bathroom. ugh. reminded me of the corned beef hash incident. then i washed and washed and washed my hands, and brushed my teeth to get rid of the taste that was still lingering in my mouth. but it didn’t work. then i noticed that a few chunks ended up on my shirt. *sigh* changed again and went back to wash. my sink is backed up now, so i have to go clean that up, too. ugh.

so now it is 4am, and i can’t get to sleep. i wonder about how my body is affected, since i just went through something similiar only a week ago. has my body recovered? do i have enough white cells left in me to fight off this bacteria or virus, or has it been depleted because of last week? my tummy will rumble every now and then, but so far, nothing has come out, yet. though i probably just jinxed myself. but i just want it all out so i can get better and at least enjoy the last weekend before i have to go back! give me sunday, at least? please?

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