Archive for March, 2008

what i have learned

what i have learned this past month doing these lists for nablopomo:

  1. i’m terrible at making lists! gosh!
  2. i am terrible at thinking up topics.
  3. i’m terrible with organizing them and coming up with more than 3 items.
  4. i’m a terrible complainer.
  5. i feel terrible for putting someone through what he went through every single night this past month.
  6. i am terrible at using my “skillz” to get my way. or at least terrible to think that i am cute enough to use those skills to get my own way.
  7. i am a terrible person. period. bleah.

gosh, that’s what i learned. i suck! i can’t even make a proper list on the very last day! boooooo. so why the heck did i agree to the challenge of doing april as well?!?! *sigh*

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these dreams

the sweetest song is silence / that i’ve ever heard / funny how your feet / in dreams never touch the earth / in a wood full of princes / freedom is a kiss / but the prince hides his face / from dreams in the mist…

  1. i used to have this recurring dream when i was younger of the house that was next to my aunty’s house, which we went to every new year’s day. i dreamt it was full of draculas and ghosts. it always started out the same–we’d be at my aunty’s house, and it was like a regular new year’s day…red firecracker paper lined the streets, the smell of gunpowder in the air…and my cousins and i would be drawn to that house, and we’d enter it and be chased down these steps that kept growing and growing and growing…i’d always wake up with my heart pounding! but i never told anyone about it–until just a few years ago. come to find out, all of my sisters and i had been having that very same dream about that very same house!!!! spooky or what? no one ever talked about it…yet we all dreamt it. we were squicked out after that.
  2. i would very rarely have a dream about this guy i crushed on since intermediate. he was soooo handsome. and i would go to bed each night, filling my head with thoughts of him, hoping to dream about him. but i very rarely did. and whenever i did, i hated waking up. when i did, i would make myself go right back to sleep. but it never continued. 😦
  3. i did have a dream about another boy at school whom i never really thought twice about. he was just in a couple of my classes, but that was it. i once had a dream where … well, we got intimate, and it felt very real. when i woke up, i was actually *sore*. needless to say, i could never look at that boy ever again! it was one real weird dream!
  4. i used to dream about war a lot. one very vivid dream had me standing at the intermediate school i went to. there’s one building, where when you step out into the lanai you can see all the way down to the ocean. in my dream, i was standing on the lanai when the sirens starting going off–i could see planes coming in from the ocean, dropping bombs, explosions going off all among the buildings in town and the houses that dotted the land all the way down to the sea. everyone around me was screaming and running, but i stood there absolutely terrified. then a bomb landed right next to me–but was a dud and didn’t explode. that’s how a lot of my war ones ended. i’d then will myself awake by then.
  5. i would constantly dream of being chased. while i’m running, i would stop and i would wish *become invisible NOW*. sometimes it worked in my dreams, and sometimes it didn’t.
  6. i once dreamt i shot my sister. it was the weirdest thing. we were both standing behind poles to block the shots and were just taking shots at each other, almost playing like, purposely missing. but then she kept nipping me in the shins and heels with her shots. so i got mad, and stood there and unloaded 5 rounds right into her chest. the shock on her face when i did that–oh my gosh. i couldn’t get that look out of my mind for days after. after i shot her, i went over to her and walked her over to the bathroom to get a towel to help clean her up and i kept telling her sorry, but she shouldn’t have kept nipping me in the heels. then i woke up, hating myself for having such a dream!!! again, that look on her face haunted me for the following days, and in fact, i can still see it in my mind as i’m remembering it now. ick.
  7. i can tell when it’s time to go back to school, because i’ll always have dreams solely to do with school. it usually has to do with my students not listening to me. and i’ll always have a mixture of students, from past years, and sometimes, classmates i had would be in my class (still at their elementary age, even though they should be my age). so soon, those dreams will start again! *sigh*
  8. i’ve also had quite a few falling dreams. those are scary!
  9. when i was pregnant, i’d have a lot of dreams about the baby. not weird dreams, like how some women get, but just very … real dreams. come to find out, several of the dreams i had did come true later … especially one dealing with the baby’s father.
  10. i’ve not had them in a while, maybe since i was pregnant, but every once in a while, i’d have a dream, but it’s quickly forgotten…and then it comes true. because as it is happening in real life, i’m thinking, wait a minute. why is this so familiar? totally deja vu. then i’ll remember it happened in a dream. weird huh?

i used to so be into dream interpretation. i had several books. it is fascinating to see just what the mind is doing to entertain itself as you sleep, and more importantly, why it is showing you those scenes! i totally should have been a psychologist.

what we did to pass the time

it’s been a while since all of us sisters have gotten to hang out together. one’s always gone somewhere or had something to do, and while all the grandkids may be there, it was rare when all the sisters would be there. today, though, we just all happened to end up at mom’s house at the same time. we played games, much like we did when we were younger. our family hardly went out, and we really didn’t have a lot of money, so we often had to make up our own games to entertain ourselves. here are some things we did:

  1. charades. my sisters and i would make our own charades out of slips of paper we’d cut up from the scratch paper my dad would bring home. we would write characters from movies and put it in a big, empty licorice container, so it gave the papers an odd smell. we’d pick a name and we’d say something they said from a movie. we also did a song version where it was just a word on the paper and we had to sing a line from a song with that word. we loved it whenever we pulled the word “baby” or “girl”. there were so many songs with those words in them! we would go on and on.
  2. rockband. okay, we didn’t have the videogame, but we used our own things. we’d usually have mtv on and we’d take turns being the singer, or the guitar player, or whatever, depending on what the video was that came on tv. yes, we were weird.
  3. boardgames. my mom and dad would play scrabble at least once a week, and i think that’s what got us started on boardgames. they’d always indulge us a game all together, then after all the kiddies got their turns, they’d play another game all by themselves. when i was older, i’d always look at kaybee, sometimes they’d have their games for only $5!!! so i’d get them and that’s what we play whenever we’re all together, even now. scattegories, guesstures, outburst!, tribonds, pictionary, and trivial pursuit were some of our favorites. we’d even take a bunch to my grandma’s house and get all the cousins and uncles and aunts involved. fun times!
  4. use up paper. my dad would bring home stacks and stacks of scratch paper. we’d help use them up by just drawing. i used to love to do comics. my sisters would write notes or do origami. again, we’d use them to make our charades games. there was always an abundance of paper around, and lots of things to do with it. my son is the same way now, and luckily i have a job that has a lot of extra scratch paper too. not as much as my dad’s did, but still enough to satisfy his drawing or making puzzles needs.
  5. read. my mom would take us to the library every wednesday since it was a short day at school. we’d borrow tons of books (like 10+ each) and lug them all back home and just read. my mom still takes the weekly trips to the library, but sadly, by herself, unless the grandkids are with her. luckily, that’s one trait they all inherited as well, the love to read.
  6. fight. yes, my sisters and i did get into our fair share of tussles. *blush* we get along great now, and actually, most of the time, we did. but we did get into the fights every now and then, and i still have the battle scars all over my arms to prove it!
  7. watch movies. over and over and over and over. that’s how i know all the words to things like grease and goonies. we had the tapes and we’d just watch it over and over and over. my younger sister is still into this. she knows a LOT about movies and when i used to play my trivia games on yahoo!, she was my go-to for the movies. but scary how 25 years later, we can all remember the dialogue in certain movies. shows how many times we watched them!!!
  8. sticking together. yes, we did get into our fights, as i mentioned before, and since there were 3 of us, it usually ended up 2 vs 1, with the 1 getting beaten up by the other 2. however, the 3 of us stuck together in the “outside” world. no matter what, we had each other’s backs. and i think it still continues on to today, where not one of the 3 of us would hesitate to help the other. no matter how much we fought, we still are pretty close. 🙂

awww. i’ve got the best sisters in the world! 🙂

why i have a difficult time making lists

or, the excuse list.

  1. topics. i have a hard time thinking of topics. i think the journal writing was easier in that i could just write whatever i wanted–things that didn’t make sense, long rants, carefully composed chronicles–it didn’t matter! the format was up to me, and i could choose whatever i felt like. now that i’m stuck to one type, you’d think it would be easier for me, but it’s in fact harder. what if i don’t feel like doing a list today?
  2. words. if you haven’t noticed, i am rambly. i can go on and on with my words. in my head, a list is a short little list of words, yet i have to go and explain each one with sentences, which is the opposite of a list, i think?
  3. items. i come up with things to write about but then figure out it only comes down to two or three different headings. to me, a list is not something with only 2 or 3 items. it has to be more. it just doesn’t seem full enough, and so i try to think of more things, but really, they’re just offshoots a previously-mentioned item and then i don’t have any more items! then it’s not a list! like see? this could go under topics #1 above. argh.
  4. flow. okay, i know that’s a purpose of a list, but i like things to flow from one paragraph to another. lists seems so choppy. i feel like i have to make transitional sentences even though i know it’s perfectly alright, given that this is a list.
  5. ignorance. i lack the talent of making good lists. therefore, i prefer not to do it.
  6. rebellion. knowing that i have to makes me not want to. yes, i am a terrible person.

…three…more…days…

paranoia

i always feel like somebody’s watching me / and i have no privacy …

  1. i watch too many forensic crime shows, and i get it in my head that it’s going to happen to me. well, there has been a break-in, or at least an attempted break-in, here, so i have reason to be afraid. especially the other day as i was walking to the mailbox to check the mail, i saw at the next building over a boy standing right up next to a window. he looked to be a teenage boy and he was just right up by the window. i had no idea what he was doing. i wonder if he knew that that house is owned by a police officer? anyway i stayed and watched for a while, to see what he would do and if i’d have to call the police. but then he went away. i don’t know if he was calling his friend, peeping inside, or what? but that was scary, even though the boy looked to be about 12 or so. anyway, yes. since witnessing that, ***paranoid!***
  2. i swear i have a paranoia of cameras. i just don’t trust them. even if a student points one my way i’m like what are you doing and why are you doing that? what is it for?
  3. whenever anyone approaches me (especially at work), i really do think they’re coming to yell at me, even if they’re smiling. i really don’t trust people who say they “need to speak with” me. more like they’re going to yell and bite my head off.
  4. i can’t go around a certain town without feeling totally paranoid, like everyone hates me. i swear i see stink eyes from anyone who glances my way. i still get all woozy, even though that was years ago. i still feel like someone is just going to appear in front of me and start chewing me out, right there in front of everyone. *shudder* so i’m constantly trying to sneak around or find places to hide whenever i’m somewhere where i think some of those people might be.
  5. because of the above, i fear being stalked. i actually was, during this time. so whenever i drive, i’m constantly checking the rearview window and if i think a car looks too familiar, i will go out of my way to drive anywhere else but home, to try and “lose” the car. of course, the car probably had no idea, but yeah. paranoid.
  6. i just noticed the tips of two of the tines on my fork is missing. eeeek. i ingested plastic.
  7. i soooo think this house is home to a giant king centipede who is just waiting for me to relax and let down my guard so it can come and pierce its fangs into my skin and inject tons and tons and tons of poison into me. i’m serious.
  8. if anything “good” happens, i automatically think something bad is going to follow. i don’t know if that’s a paranoia, but i can remember being a teenager and still thinking that way when we were getting the nintendo (finally!!!)–while riding home, i was so sure i was going to get into a car accident and never be able to play it.
  9. i tend to think little pains means i’m having a heart attack. how many times have i called my mom asking her to describe what it feels like because i think i am having one right now?
  10. i am very nervous in water. i’m always sure i’m going to drown. i don’t like riding in boats because i feel like it’s going to tip over and i’m going to get my foot caught in a giant clam and i’m going to drown.

… i think i’m paranoid … and complicated …

unfinished

as i look around the room, i see many unfinished projects. i start with good intentions, and either because i run out of time, or i lose interest, i never finish them. each unfinished project has a story, though, soooo…

  1. baby blanket. it’s a pink baby blanket that has purple, green, and turquoise flowers along the border. it’s a beautiful blanket, if i ever get around to finishing it. i originally made it for a colleagues’ baby. they had been trying for years, and they were finally blessed with a little princess. so i made this beautiful pink blanket for her. i got all the flowers done, and got started on the pink part. but she ended up coming almost 2 months early, so i never got to finish it–i instead bought her a blanket, and put away the blanket. about a year later, my cousin and his wife, who had been trying for years, too, announced they were having a little girl. so i pulled it out, and finished up the pink part. the only thing i had to do was join all the flowers together with lace and then border the pink part. however, my cousin’s wife is verrrrrrry picky and i found out that she wouldn’t want something handmade–it has to come from … and i can’t remember the name of the company, but that’s the only place she wanted things from. so i put it away again. *sigh* i keep saying i’ll finish it for when *i* have my little girl, but … that’s looking impossible right now.
  2. i bought a whole bunch of yarn when i got a brochure on care bears. so i took orders from everyone and bought the yarn and was going to make a bunch of care bears. then my mom was in the hospital, and i never even started any of them. the yarn is still stacked neatly in the wal-mart bags in my closet.
  3. i bought a whole bunch of fuzzy yarn to make teddy bears and other animals. i made … two. *blush* part of it was because i could not find the exact colors for the yarn that i needed (one brand was not made any more) and i’m not that knowledgeable enough to know what yarn could replace it. plus, it was in knit, which is what i was trying to teach myself how to do, and it took a lot of practice. i had planned to make a whole zoo of them for my son when he was a baby, one summer, but only got to make the piggie and the alligator by the time the summer was up. when i had to go back to school, i couldn’t work on them any more, and i never picked them up again after that. *sigh*
  4. i made my niece a little shrug that had a fuzzy boa-like trim around the edges. i couldn’t believe that she actually wore it to school, but she did. her teacher commented on how much she’d like one for her daughter, so my niece asked me to make one for her. so i made one (that one i did finish!!!). then my sister was like, oh can you make a bunch for me? she picked out her colors and styles and everything. then my mom asked for one, too. so i bought all the yarn–found the most softest yarn ever, in a variety of colors, for pretty cheap at wal-mart. i bought the elastic and everything. and i finished one shrug–but ended up making it a bit too small for my sister (it would’ve fit my niece, though, but she didn’t like the color). so i was going to start again…only i never did. i think the summer ended, too, for that one.
  5. i saw these cute photo frames at a craft store, and thought to myself, i can do that! so i was going to do it for my son’s babysitter for christmas. i bought all the material and was set to work; i just had to figure out how to make the pattern. i didn’t have any cardboard around. so i was going to get oaktag, but i would always forget! soon it was the last week of school and i wasn’t going to see my son’s babysitter so i had to come up with something else. *sigh*
  6. one of the bathrooms has an ocean theme. i found the perfect kleenex box to make to match the shower curtains and the carpet. i at least finished all 5 sides of the kleenex box–all i needed to do was put the 5 sides together, and i would be done! but i don’t know what happened with that one! i know i had to put it aside, but i don’t know why i never finished it. in fact, i could do it so quickly right now…but i don’t want to. weird.
  7. i bought a whole bunch of soap stuff to make my own soaps. i wanted to make it in ocean shapes to go in my ocean-themed bathroom. i made 3! but i have a whole bunch of supplies and i never went back to them. they didn’t come out as nice as i thought they would, and just seemed like too much trouble to make something that didn’t come out as nice. but i have seen those recently that look like they have petals in them? beautiful! i want to try those next! 😛
  8. i also bought candle supplies to make my own clear-wax candles with stuff like shells and stuff at the bottom, again for the ocean-themed bathroom. i found out i needed a special pan to melt the wax in and yes, i never went and got that pan. *sigh*
  9. i was really into beads a while back, and made lots of beaded bracelets and earrings–as long as i was in a class! once i brought it home, i never made it again. well once in a while, i’ll make a quick pair of earrings when my mom requests one, but other than that–my bin of beads just sits there, waiting patiently to be made into some sorta trinket. i think i’ll get back into that this summer.
  10. i think march’s nablopomo will go here. these lists are driving me crazy and i’m tempted to just not do it any more. it’d just add to the tons of things i never finish! heeheeheehee…

favorite foods to make when I was younger

when we were younger, we had to cook dinner once a week. we had to do everything–buy the food, prepare it, and then clean up afterwards. my night was wednesday because that was the only night i didn’t have hula or anything. it was torture trying to think of something to cook that was within budget. i sympathized with my mom who would always ask us when we’re younger what we’d want for dinner, and we’d answer “i don’t know.” i had that same frustration!!!

  1. spaghetti. my mom taught me this when i was younger. i didn’t use spaghetti sauce, either. i made it with tomato sauce, paste, tomatoes, spices, and sugar. i remember once i put in too much sugar, and that night both my sisters’ boyfriends were over, so they ate, too, and i think i had forgotten that i had already put in sugar, and i put in more, and it was way tooooooo sweet. so my sister’s boyfriend, in disgust, went around and took orders from everyone for mcdonalds and went out and got mcdonalds. i sat there with my bowl of spaghetti all sad. i ended up throwing the whole thing out. both my sisters’ boyfriends never came to dinner on a wednesday night again.
  2. lasagna. same thing as the spaghetti, we made our own sauce. this was fun to make, though, and it always came out pretty good.
  3. macaroni (see a pattern?). again, made our own sauce. it was cheap and easy to make.
  4. grunge. again, easy and cheap. my sisters didn’t care for it, but my dad liked it. now, though, both my sisters like it and will make it every so often. my son still turns up his nose at it, though.
  5. shepherd’s pie. i looooved this whenever we had it at school. this is the yummiest thing! my mom had purchased a school cookbook and this recipe was in it!!! so i made this often. again, cheap and easy to make, so a big plus! my sisters didn’t like it, but now, my little sister makes this all the time.
  6. munchskins. yummy! again, cheap! ground beef, taco seasoning, and potatoes! oh, and cheese. yummmmmm.
  7. chowder. i only made this when i had a little bit more money to spend! this was a bit more expensive, but everyone loves chowder, especially on a cold, rainy day.
  8. Portuguese bean soup/tripe stew. i did this too when i had more money to spend. it was expensive getting all the ingredients together. i would wait until hamhocks got on sale, usually. towards the end, i would always add tripe in there, yum!
  9. chili. another easy dish. but i think i only made it if beans were on sale. now i just do it the easy way–boil those packets from zippys! their chili is much better, anyway.
  10. drumsticks. very easy to make, but you had to wait until the drummettes came on sale. but just sprinkle the garlic salt and pepper on it, bake it, and it’s done! yum!

things i'm grateful for

okay after yesterday’s list, which i feel extremely guilty about, i know i have to come back with something better. these are the things i’m glad are in my life (without sounding too sappy, i hope…):

  1. my family, of course. my mom has always been so supportive and just always there. so much so, that i can’t imagine life without her. my sisters are helpful, too–we talk a lot and can just go off on tangents but still follow each other. i can go to one for certain things, and one for other things–i know which to go to whenever i need to talk. even my dad, though he hasn’t been around lately. i mean, i think back in high school of all the times he drove me to hula practice, 3 days a week, to kailua, and including all the fundraisers and stuff we’d have, and when he’d drive me to work and pick me up and when he’d pick me up when i was feeling too sick to ride the bus home. he never complained about it. oh great, now i’m getting teary.
  2. another one would be my son. everyone tells me i’m so lucky to have him, and i truly agree. of course, he’s not a teenager yet, so…we’ll see! heeheehee. hopefully his good behavior and cheerful attitude now doesn’t turn sour when those hormones start flowing. eeeeesh. that might just be my just payoff for having such an easy time with him now.
  3. i’m thankful for my job. yes, i cannot believe i am actually saying that. with all the heartache it’s given me?? but i am lucky to have a job. it does pay my mortgage and my car and so i am thankful it’s given me enough to do that, and allow me to live independently. people who make $80k say they could never afford to live here, but i prove i can with half that. so there! 😀
  4. i have some colleagues that really look out for me. even though they’re no longer at my school, they still write to check up on me, and are willing to drop off stuff here that they come across that they i can use. so nice!
  5. i have the greatest students this year. seriously.
  6. i’m grateful for my computer which allows me to connect with others in the comfort of my own home. plus, all the things you can learn! my goodness! i can spend all day (and have many times!) just following link after link after link, reading and absorbing all … very fun!
  7. my sister says i have this ability to just look at something and be able to figure out how it’s made, or just watch someone start something, and from there, take off and then already be two-steps ahead of them by the time they’re finished. i guess i’m grateful for that ability, though sometimes i think it comes off as impatience! heeheehee. but it does help when looking at some sorta craft object and having to figure out how it’s made.
  8. i’m happy my mom instilled in me a love for reading.
  9. i’m happy my dad instilled in me a love for music.
  10. i have such good hula sisters and a great kumu hula who just really put her faith in me, and well, just all of them. some of my best memories are with them.
  11. i had the best babysitter take care of my boy. her whole family welcomed him in as one of theirs that sometimes when i used to pick him up i’d feel like i’m tearing him right out of their hearts. but i know that they’re the reason why my son is the way he is. he was very much loved, and i couldn’t have asked for anything better, knowing i couldn’t have been the one there giving him the love he needed (oh no, the tears again!). but seriously, some sitters are just so businesslike. and seeing that i only came upon her as my very last resort–i’m so happy i did!
  12. i’ve had some good, caring teachers. some pushed me very hard, some let me get away with things, but all really cared. or they were real good actors!
  13. my uncle once told me when i was like 5 that he hoped his daughter (before he actually had one) would have the love for steak i had. ha! i do like my meat. sorry, cows. but thank you!
  14. i’m grateful for this island i live upon. yes, it has some bad points. but overall, i don’t think i could be happier anywhere else. the weather, the beaches, the mountains…just all very lovely and wonderful, and i know i’m lucky to be able to call here home.
  15. and i will be VERY grateful in 7 days for this to be all over! 😀

highly irritated

oh, i really didn’t want to post something like this. i have just been so irritable lately. and i don’t know why, because the things i get irritated at are the very same things i do myself! so maybe seeing it out will be a therapy for me and help me to get over this.

  1. twitter is getting on my nerves–or more, its users. too much back and forth that could be saved for IMing or email.
  2. i keep getting irritated at someone’s complaining. especially because this person did it intentionally. why not kick back, enjoy, and most importantly, appreciate?
  3. i just put my 46th person on ignore (i actually had to go back and change that number 3 times while composing this post!!!). what is up with yahoo!messenger tonight? somewhere out there, there’s a list of people to contact, especially if you’re a married man, or a “young female” who thinks the people on this list are all male. and for some reason, my name is on this list!!!
  4. i am annoyed at my neighbors. not just the wall-thumping one. but the one who lives across from me, too. they both park on either side of me, and are very fond of parking over the line into my stall. sometimes they both do it, and i’m stuck with having to squeeze into a tiny space and then i’m not able to open the doors to get out. irritates me like no other! especially since one of them had the nerve a while back to leave a note on my windshield saying that i park too close to her side of the line. note, i never park ON it, or OVER it. just “too close.” so i’ve given this person a little more room. to which the person now parks OVER the line into my space! grrrrrrr. this neighbor also tells visitors to park in my space–nearly every day i come home, there’s someone in my space. it gets very annoying.
  5. i am also upset at the whole association. they raised our monthly maintenance bills this year by $75 because they wanted more trash pickup service, and to do that, they’d have to pay more money. so we all agreed to the price increase. however, the trash pickup now comes one day fewer than it used to! AND they replaced all the dumpsters with SMALLER ones! we will get fined for leaving trash outside the dumpster (because they fill so darn fast now) so the only other option is to leave the rotting garbage in our lanais until trash pickup day. not so bad for me, but i just imagine those families with young babies and lots of kids–they have loads of trash! and it just has to sit in the house/on the lanai until the trash is picked up–only to have the dumpster be totally full again a half hour later, with everyone putting trash that accumulated on their lanai in the dumpster. why the heck are we paying $75 more a month for this?!?!?! i get it, we need to watch what we use and not make so much trash–but why charge us $75 more for that?!??!
  6. this is actually several weeks old, but since i’m on a roll grumbling…i wrote earlier about a problem with my son getting “notices of concern.” it was confirmed to me by the bus driver that she gives out the notices for both of the children sitting in the seat, even though only one’s the culprit. her reasoning for that, as she explained, is that they should both be keeping each other in check, so if one is acting up, and the other one is doing nothing to stop that person, then they should both get written up for it. okay. my son is going to tell the bigger, older student he sits with to please behave? but fine, if that’s her reasoning, and she’s trying to teach them to help each other out, then that’s that. just please don’t write him up for “loud-talking/laughing” and “playing with the child across the aisle” because that’s not what he did. write him up for “not helping his partner.” that way when i discipline him, it’ll be for the right thing, and not the “why are you playing on the bus?” and his denying it–when he was telling the truth. plus, the higher-ups that get copies of the notices will understand what happened, as well. not that “not doing anything” is better than the actual trouble, but you know, that paints a different picture in one’s mind.
  7. my sister’s inlaws. ugh.
  8. money. there’s never enough! 😦 i do my best to save and then something needs repair, and there goes all the money again. i’m starting to get irritated at capitalism.
  9. i can’t stand that talkaholic commercial. ugh! hurts my ears!
  10. these lists! gosh, i can’t believe i nearly forgot to add this one!

today's moods

1. anticipation
2. stress
3. hurriedness
4. irritation
5. caution
6. pain
7. HUNGER
8. anxiousness
9. doubtfulness
10. satiation
11. thirst
12. amusement
13. empathy
14. happiness
15. embarrassment
16. surprise
17. relief
18. EXHAUSTION!!!
19. annoyance
20. contentment

can you guess what I did today? 😛

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