i was told that i don’t put the effort into things when i think no one cares. if i know someone is going to be on me to keep me focused in finishing my goals, i do my best. this is true, and probably why i was such a good student. i always did all my work because i knew that’s what my teachers expected. and i did it well, because i knew it was for something. there was a purpose.

but when i think no one’s keeping tabs on me? no one cares? no one is going to listen? my drive to do things goes out the window. why even bother? i know that’s a bad attitude to have. i don’t know why i lack motivation if i think no one cares. is this why i make sure the kids know i care? to give them a reason to strive hard to reach for the stars?

my attitude needs a major change, that’s true. i can’t help but think, though: why write, if no one will read? why ask, if no one will answer? why answer, if no one will listen? why do one thing, when no one else seems to give you a second thought? why do something if it’s not going to make a difference?

mam’noon am for giving me something to think about.


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