no prompt

figures that when i decide to do prompts then they decide not to post any! 😦

well, from when they first started doing prompts:

Tuesday, June 1, 2010
When you were little, what did you want to be when you grew up?

i knew first and foremost that i wanted to be a mommy. that’s all i wanted to be when i grew up. i always played with dolls and my mom babysat, so there were always babies around. being the oldest, i was often allowed to help out and look after a sister or a cousin. i just always wanted to be a mommy to many children.

of course, when you’re in elementary school and asked that question, you can’t just say you want to be a mommy without being given a stern look. so i decided i would be a teacher. i thought it was a perfect mommy job. you’d have the same breaks as your kids and can spend all vacations with them. i always had a good relationship with my teachers, but there were a few i really bonded with, and i always thought, wow, i really like this. i liked staying in at recess or after school to help them put up stuff on the bulletin boards, or clean the chalkboards, or, as i got older, help them correct things. i loved helping out, and it really just seemed like a perfect fit.

as i got older, my eyes were opened to new things, which always fascinated me. so i remember being in 9th grade speech class, and we had to do a speech on what we’d like to be when we grew up. i wanted to experience new worlds, different cultures, languages. but i realized i’d need a job where travel was included, because it’s expensive to travel! so my 9th grade brain came up with being a flight attendant. i did have an aunty who was a flight attendant, and i knew when she had layovers in the different countries, she’d go out and experience it and shop and eat. i remember standing up at the podium and saying my speech, and a couple of sophomores in the back row pretended to snore. when i listed a con to my job as being that i would be away from family a lot, another sophomore girl rolled her eyes at me. still, that was an important thing to consider for me, as well as the fact that i was too short and not pretty enough. it was something to daydream about, though. 😛

by senior year i had two passions–marine biology and computer science. i was enrolled in ap computer science and always did very well with my programming. i was the only girl in my class yet i was the only one who ever had all my programs work. 😛 yeah, take that, guys who think girls can’t be programmers. 🙄 the guys used to bow down to me in that class–yes, i was worshipped by nerds. woo! anyway, my teacher really encouraged me to go into computer science in college, and i always thought that’d be a good career choice–i was guaranteed a job, right? and working with a computer, how much fun would that be! but i also enjoyed marine biology–i loved going to the beach, and i took one marine biology class my senior year and was hooked. this is what i was going to major in!

but…the university i went to had no degree in marine biology, though it did have a marine options program, which i completed. though i hung out in the sun computer lab *all*the*time*, i was turned away from computer science because i was “female–no one is going to hire you, so if you think this is going to get you a job, then you’re dead wrong.” that shouldn’t have stopped me from learning what i wanted to learn, but there were other passions i had–i always loved writing, and i became a t.a. in the english department to help with that passion. i tore into my language study, and thought i could always work in the archives, translating and transcribing old newspapers and tapes. and i always thought how maybe studying the human mind and thinking could make me understand things better. the university had a lot of opportunities for me to find out what i wanted to do!

during my senior year at college, the professor that i worked for really pushed me into teaching. i had admitted to her that it’s what i once wanted to do when i was little, but i didn’t think i could be one now. but she pushed, not so much because she thought i’d be a good teacher, but because they really needed teachers then–enough that they were giving out tuition waivers. so after graduating i spent a semester wandering about, choosing a variety of different courses to whet my palate, before i decided to take her up on her offer of the tuition waiver.

and i’ve been living in hell ever since. *sigh*

funny thing is i was told by the college of education’s admissions person that i would probably not get hired, due to my personality (which is different from saying it’s because of your sex, because in this case, he was right–i do not have the teacher personality). but did i let that stop me like i did the computer science admissions guy’s assessment of me? nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. i’m such an idiot.

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