scared

i don’t know what’s up with these heart things. it’s just not going away. i think it’s one thing and then i’m proven wrong. but i know it’s not all in my head…these things are real. and then i get so worked up about it i probably just make it worse.

all day i’ve felt like someone is pressing into my chest, and my left arm is numb off and on. it could be because i’ve been leaning on my left side most of the day. but the heart thing is what scares me. it goes off so often that it just can’t be good. i keep telling people that but they brush it off like nothing. sometimes i wonder if i should just check straight in to the er? i don’t know. i hope that if it is anxiety that somehow i can relax. my mind is just working too hard, i guess. but i don’t know how to stop it from going off the path into the dark area. i try to distract myself with other things and totally forget what i was doing and then bam! my heart goes funky, and i start thinking of it again. how do i just go back to normal??

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